April, 2008

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One Year

Tuesday, April 29th, 2008

Yup. It’s been one whole year since Shae and I got hitched. To say it’s been a busy year would be an understatement. In the last 12 months we got married, bought a house, got a dog, bought a business, and somehow found the time to knock Shae up (times two). I need a break. (Call it a hunch, but I don’t think that’s gonna happen.)

For our anniversary, Shae got me Mario Kart and a shirt. I got her some maternity clothes. I’m pretty sure I read somewhere that the first anniversary is the maternity clothes anniversary; the matern-iversary. Of course, I also let Shae win at Mario Kart as an extra anniversary present. I’m way too nice sometimes.

I should also point out that in addition to being our anniversary it’s also Lunchbox’s first birthday. He got a $2 toy. I hope my kids are that cheap. (Another hunch, I don’t think they will be. I really don’t like my hunches sometimes.)

Goofing Off In The Doc’s Office

Thursday, April 24th, 2008

Shae and I had our third visit to the doc today and everything is still good. There are still two and apparently they’re doing fine. Now that we got that out of the way, here’s a recap of our visit.

Just for the hell of it, we actually got to the doctor’s office early for our appointment this time. The first thing we noticed when we got to the office was that our nemesis couple was there. Not only has this couple had the appointment before us every time we’ve seen the doc, but they’re having twins too. Since they finish their appointment right before us, they always seem to get the slot right before us for the next visit. It’s a vicious cycle. We hate them. Maybe one of these visits we’ll actually talk to them and become best friends, but I doubt it.

Thanks to our favorite couple getting in to see the doctor before us, Shae and I had about a 45 minute wait in our little exam room. All I can say about our wait is that there is no way Shae and I are anywhere near mature enough for this whole kid thing. Our wait included laughing hysterically at my farts, analyzing posters of the female reproductive system, and whispering like we were in a library. We aren’t even mature enough to handle a poster with the term “hypogonadism” on it. Every time it sounded like our door was opening we both jumped and got really guilty looks on our faces like we just got caught with our hands in the cookie jar. It was like we were in detention or something and we were scared the teacher was going to walk back into the room and catch us talking. Also, we discovered that apparently they make a chewable birth control pill now. That information might have been useful several months ago. I’m thinking they might want to move that advertisement out to the lobby. Basically, now you can go straight from Flintstones vitamins to the pill (“We’re the Flintstones kids. Ten million strong…And growing!”).

Eventually the doc got to us and it was time to take a look at the kids, but first we got to listen to the heartbeat(s). When I tell this story to my children I’m sure hearing their heartbeats will be a huge life-changing event, but for now it just sounded like a fast heartbeat. After we were done listening we got to see the twins again. If you look at the pics, you can actually see Baby A pretty well (head at the left, knees up). Our doctor drew her own diagram below the pic to help you guys out. Baby B wasn’t quite as cooperative (no surprise there, according to Shae “B” is the one who’s always flipping me off) and is supposedly sitting cross-legged. I’ll take the docs word on that, but she drew another picture to help out.

Finally, Lunchbox made his first sacrifice for the babies this weekend. We were at Petco picking up a few things on Saturday and the Humane Society was there with their “Adopt Me” pets. You know what they had? A baby yellow lab puppy. If not for the two little weights sitting on Shae’s bladder I think there’s about a 99% chance that LB would have gotten a new playmate. Oh well, I think he’ll live.

Pretty Slow Around Here

Thursday, April 17th, 2008

I wish I had more stories to share about pregnant Shae, but not a lot is going on. Just to keep everyone updated, here’s pretty much everything that’s happening:

  • We have another doctor appointment next week but until then it’s pretty much just life with Shae and all of her personalities.
  • According to the doc we will be able to tell the sex(es) at around 18 weeks which means we won’t know until the appointment after this one at the soonest (probably another month or so).
  • Lately Shae’s had a craving for pickles which if I’m not mistaken is what got us into this pickle in the first place (everyone see what I did there?). Some might say that was too easy but with as slow as things have been around here, I’m using it anyway.
  • Shae has headaches, back-aches, lots of pee-breaks, and a lot of other ‘akes’ I can’t think of right now.

Since there’s not much new on the pregnancy front, guess what I get to write about…that’s right, more Lunchbox. Apparently, our dog has gone from top dog to having to repeat his canine-good-citizenship (CGC) class. Actually, it’s not LB, it’s the entire class that has been advised to repeat. We think our pup would pass his test OK, but CGC class is fun so if we can retake it at a discount (which we can) we have no problem with that. Besides, right now CGC is the most exciting thing we have going on.

Last weekend our class was at Chollas Lake Park. This class was by far the closest to home so of course we were the last ones to show up (although we still got there right on time). It was in the mid 90’s on Sunday, and the dogs were definitely distracted by the heat. When we walked out on dock the dogs (especially LB) had problems walking on the hot surface and we had to cut our time on the dock short. I guess we should have taken Lunchbox’s booties with us to class.

After about 40 more minutes of working with the dogs we finally gave up (the dogs were having a really hard time dealing with the heat) and were in the middle of discussing issues we’re having with our dogs (not us of course, LB is perfect) when a cop pulled up and told us we had to leave because the park was closing. It was a little early but we didn’t think too much of it and started wandering up to our cars. I started to sense something was up when he went up to everyone else in the park and told them it was time to leave because they were closing the park. “Closing the park” sounded a little more ominous than the park closing, but maybe it’s just me. As we were loading up (AKA helping our pathetic dog into the car) another cop pulled up and announced over the loud speaker that park was closed and everyone had to leave. Shae made a comment along the lines of “did they find a dead body or something?” and sure enough the lady getting into the car next to us informed us that, in fact, they did.

This week we’re taking the dogs to an Italian restaurant for dinner, which I’m sure will be plenty exciting too. I just hope there are no dead bodies involved.

Somebody Likes The Water (Hint: It’s LB)

Wednesday, April 9th, 2008

Back in 1996 a friend of mine suggested I should join him on a youth group trip down to the Mexicali Valley. I didn’t have anything else to do over spring break so I decided to tag along. Somewhere along the line I realized that one of the girls in the youth group was interested in me. She had big…ummm…personality…so I decided I could do worse and 11 years later we got married (talk about moving fast). The lesson: be careful when a friend asks you to go to Mexico, you could end up catching something that stays with you for life.

Last weekend, the youth group celebrated their 20th year going to Mexicali and had a reunion to celebrate. Shae and I figured that since we have the youth group to thank/blame for our relationship we should head up to King City for the weekend. The reunion was fun, and it was great to catch up with people I haven’t seen since high school. I also thought showing up with a twin-carrying wife might be a warning to the youngsters about what can happen if you marry your high school girlfriend after 11 years of dating (I’d say “high school sweetheart” but Shae’s not always all that sweet, especially when the twins make her cranky).

That’s a great story, but what does any of this have to do with Lunchbox? I’m glad you asked. While we were visiting the parents, we decided to take LB out to Lake San Antonio to let him play in the water. We had taken him once before and he was a little hesitant at first (he got over it in about five minutes). We didn’t have any such issues this time.

Actually, our problem was getting him out of the water. It could have been because I sounded like a 12-year-old when I was calling him, but in my defense Shae started recording after I’d been trying to get him out of the lake for a while. I’ve said it before and I’ll probably say it again: top dog my ass.

Back-To-Back

Tuesday, April 8th, 2008

So, Shae did it again. For the second year in a row she beat me and everyone else in our March Madness pool. I guess I’m happy that I don’t have to ship the trophy to anyone else but I was really hoping to avoid another year of gloating about what a awesome bracket-filler-outer she is.

Being the college basketball expert she is, Shae thought she should share her thoughts as she filled out her bracket. Here are a few of the highlights:

On why she had NC in the Final Four: “My aunt lives in North Carolina, so they have to go far.”

On picking Memphis to win it all (lucky for her she clinched when Kansas and Memphis won in the semi-finals): “Country music is from Memphis so they’ll win.”

Sienna: “It’s the name of a minivan and we have twins coming, but I don’t want a minivan so they only get one win.”

San Diego: C’mon, this one’s obvious.

UNLV: “I want to go to Vegas.”

I know that this is nothing new. The people who win these pools every year use reasons like this to make their picks, but it’s still frustrating to hear Shae give me her bracket advice as she gloats about her victory. I hate her so much right now. Of course, the fact that I have yet to finish in the top-5 despite filling out two brackets each of the last four years could have something to do with it. I might have to rethink my method of watching one game a year, reading a couple of articles, and picking winners based on how good the teams were five years ago when I actually followed college basketball. Oh well, congrats wifey.