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The Kids

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Update From Lunchbox

Tuesday, May 30th, 2017

Hey everyone! Long time no blog. I’d like to blame the humans for not letting me on the laptop anymore, but honestly I’m just too old and tired to be bothered to share my awesome thoughts with the world. Oh, and my toenails are too long. Well, since I recently got a trim and there’s a ton to fill you guys in on, I decided to sneak Mommy’s laptop out of her bag and let you guys know what’s really going on.

A ton has changed since last time I put paw to keyboard, most notably that the annoying babies have turned into even more annoying kids. However, there is one thing that bears mentioning above the rest: the little bitch. The humans scold me when I call her that, but what else do you call a female dog who’s smaller than you? They call her Whiskey, but I’m pretty sure that’s just because they’re alcoholics and now no one can tell if they’re getting drunk or scolding the brown monster. Whatever her name is, a little over two years ago the humans brought home the insane monstrosity known as Whiskey. Sure, she started out cute but that got old about a month later when she chewed on my shoulder so much that I had to go into surgery to get a tiny little tumor removed (fine Dad, it was huge and gross). Anyway, the tumor wasn’t a problem for almost 8 years until she showed up. Since then, it’s been week after week of torture from my new “sister”. She’s always stealing my bed, stealing attention, and getting both of us in trouble. I’m sure I’m supposed to say I love her, so sure. Whatever. If you think she’s cute, you live with her. I could go on for hours about how annoying Whiskey is, but lately there’s more going on I need to fill you in on.

I’m not really sure what’s going on, but there is weird shit going on with the humans. It started a couple of months ago with putting a bunch of stuff in boxes. They were nice enough to avoid any of my stuff, but they did pack up a lot of the small human’s toys that I use when I can’t find my toys fast enough. Then, a weird sign appeared in the front yard. Shortly after, things got REALLY weird. All kinds of new people started coming by the house. You’d think that would annoy me, but it was great! Every time someone new came by, I got to go for a walk (which is awesome, even if the bitch has to go too). Occasionally, we’d even go to parks, restaurants, etc. It was like the old days, before the small humans took over. Lately the visitors have dropped off, but the packing has picked up again. Today, three strangers came over and put everything we own in boxes. They even boxed up almost all of my toys (I’d be annoyed, but brown poop-monster steals them all anyway). 

I’m not sure what’s going on, but the humans keep talking about how we are going to be “Colorado dogs” or “snow dogs”. So, when the humans were at dinner tonight I did a little Googling and figured out that Colorado is a state halfway across the country. Don’t even get me started on this “snow” shit. I watched some videos of dogs playing in snow that look like tons of fun, if you’re three or four. I’m 10! I’m way too old for this shit! I also looked up how long I’m going to have to share the back of the car with the beast. Three days?!? No thanks. Maybe whoever moves into our house wants an awesome, super-smart, well behaved “mature” dog.

That’s what’s going on in the life of Lunchbox lately. Annoying kids, super-annoying sister, and now this whole moving thing. So, basically the humans continue to suck and I continue to pay the consequences.

 

Thankful

Friday, November 14th, 2014

November marks the month when men try to grow a mustache, and our Facebook feeds fill up with posts about what people are thankful for.  Rather than make a post each day, I figured I would sit down with my cup of coffee while I’m curled up on the couch under my blanket and put my thoughts down here.  I am beyond thankful that I can actually do that.  I get to wake up in the morning, get the kids ready for school, and personally drop them off.  We talk about little things in the car and we review any reading or spelling words they have and then I get to say goodbye to them them.  I do not have to put them on a bus while I get ready for a 9-5 job.  I’m thankful I get to sit in the pick up line, sometimes in 100 degree weather, or when it is pouring rain, because it means I am the one who gets to watch my kids run to the car with smiles on their faces (most of the time), I get to hear all about their day and then I get to help them with their homework.  Sure, sometimes homework totally blows, and sometimes they have bad days at school, but I am always there to comfort them.  The point is, I am thankful it is ME that gets to do these things.  I don’t have to drop my kids off an hour early or rely on after school care to do these things.  I am thankful Pat works so hard and has such a great job, that allows me to be a SAHM and be with my kids and watch them grow up.

IMG_7784-Edit

I am thankful for everything we have.  We don’t live in the largest house, or drive the most expensive cars.  We don’t have the latest and greatest toys and gadgets, and our kids don’t get every new toy available.  And you know what, I am absolutely ok with that!  I love my house and my car.  I appreciate the things that we do have and my kids have amazing imaginations and can play for hours without a single toy.  We try to teach our kids that “stuff” isn’t important, but experiences are.  I think they are finally starting see that.  Last weekend I had plans to take the kids up to Palomar Mountain and go exploring with them.  Unfortunately, they both ended up sick and we couldn’t go.  They were more disappointed about that than when they didn’t get everything they wanted for their birthday.  It makes me happy that they value our little adventures I like taking them on.  Hopefully we are all feeling better and the weather cooperates and we can do our little adventure this weekend.

One final thought:  I am extremely thankful for the rain we got last night!!  Hopefully the skies open up and give us more!

Pics on the Bridge

Sunday, August 25th, 2013

So, recently I have been doing some pattern testing for a couple designers (sewing).  I just finished testing the Pepper Dress by Brownie Goose.  Part of testing it means I get to go take some new pictures of the kiddos.  Yay!!  I even dragged Pat along with me to help because photographing my own kids can be a major pain in the ass!  Sure they look cute once they are done, but you should see what it takes to get there!!  I had to bribe Pat with lots of beer and fish and chips from Hooly’s because he knows the hell he was about to be put through.  Anyhoo, I adore this dress pattern and this dress will be up in my Etsy shop soonish.

 

First Week of Freedom

Wednesday, August 21st, 2013

I have officially had my first week of freedom!!  It is still hard for me to grasp that the kids are now in school.

So, what did I do with my newfound freedom?  Well, I can lie and say I got a ton of stuff done, and the house all cleaned up, and the dog walked and all that stuff, but to be perfectly honest, I didn’t do a whole lot.  My first few days I just relaxed.  I went and got a pedi and did some grocery shopping with out the kids and it was totally awesome.  I was able to make it through the store without having to break up a fight, or say NO a million times as we work our way down the snack isle.

Pat had the day off on Friday so we took advantage of it.  He went with me to drop the kids off at school and then we went out to breakfast.  It was kind of nice to be able to do that again.  Actually, I think the last time we went out to breakfast, just the two of us, was back in the days before we had kids, probably hung over.  After breakfast, we headed over to Grossmont to see a movie.  Kind of nice, being able to do that without hiring a babysitter or having to have one of our parents in town.  I don’t see us doing this every time he has an off Friday, but just knowing we have the option is kind of nice.

One of the things I have been working on is the office/sewing room/craft room.  I think I finally have it just the way I want it.  I’ll save that for another post, but at least I got something accomplished while the kids were at school.  Ok, ok, I did most of it on Saturday, but still.

Oh, guess what comes along with kids starting a new school year?  Colds!!  Yup, Ella has her first cold of the school year.  Hopefully it passes quickly and she can get back to having fun at school.  Mostly I hope it passes fast and doesn’t turn into something bad and has to stay home from school because then I kind of lose my newfound freedom.

Jack Quotes

Friday, August 16th, 2013

First thing in the morning:

Shae: Jackson, do you have to pee?
Jack: No. My penis is just sticking up. And big.

After finding Shae’s bra on the chair:

Jack: Momma! I found your boobs!

Upon finding Shae and I snuggled up

Jack: Mommy, why are you guys squished?

TK

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

 

Yup, that happened.  The kids started their first day of Transitional Kindergarten.  For those of you who are not familiar with what that is, it is basically the first year of a two year kindergarten program.  It was made for the kids who have fall birthdays and miss the new age cutoff date.  It will be very similar to what kinder was like back when we were in school.  It is also know as Freedom.

We have been prepping the kids for awhile now so they knew they would be going to school all day everyday, but it was still pretty hard on them.  You could tell Jackson was trying not to cry and Ella didn’t have much to say which normally you can’t get her to shut up.  I’m not really sure what they actually did in class, but they both came home saying they had fun, so that’s all I can really hope for.  Ella said her favorite part was reading books after they did work, and Jackson said his favorite part was eating lunch.  Yup, those are my kids.

So what did I do?  No much.  I pretty much just enjoyed having the house nice and quiet for the first time in almost 5 years.  There were no fights to break up, no Legos to step on, no stories to read a billion times, I didn’t have to dress Barbie Dolls or Lalaloopsy Dolls, and I didn’t have to play castle vs. dinosaur vs. mini super hero guys.  All I had to do was drink my coffee, eat my lunch and watch a movie with lots of violence and bad language.  It was awesome!

A Letter to my Children

Sunday, October 7th, 2012

Dear Jackson and Ella,

Today you turn 4 years old.  It’s almost like you guys are actual people now and no longer my sweet little babies.  There is so much I want to tell you two.

Jack

Jackson:  My little man.  You tell me almost everyday that you are no longer a baby or a big kid.  You tell me you are a MAN!  Yup, you tell me that you pee like a man, you eat like a man, and you go to bed like a man.  I hate to break it to you, my little man, but you will ALWAYS be my baby.

You can be the sweetest little boy when you want to be and then there are times that I just want to strangle you!!  You can be very demanding when it comes to “asking” for things, but on the other hand, you are always the first one to get your sister something when she needs it.  Even though you follow the typical toddler rules about every toy being yours, you still make sure Ella has something to play with after you rip a toy out of her hands.  You want to be good.

Right now, your favorite foods are hamburgers, green beans, and cookies.  You love drinking water, but only if it has ice in it.  The reason you started liking water with ice was because you saw Grandma Jane with ice in her water.  You like to try new foods, and for the most part you like almost everything you try, however, it is a huge struggle to get you to eat your dinner.  You haven’t always been such a good eater.  There were times when the only thing I could get you to eat was spaghetti noodles or rice.  It has been a nice change of pace.

You LOVE super heroes!!  If you see anything with one of the Marvel characters on it, you totally try and convince me that you need it because it matches all your other stuff.  You like playing “superhero” with your sister, but I think it’s really just an excuse to try and beat her up.

You just started preschool and are having so much fun.  You like playing with the other kids, but you are still a little shy.  You wake up happy most school days and you are super excited to go.  Hopefully you always love school this much!

I love you more than ice cream and cameras!!

 Ella

Ella:  My baby girl.  You are such a little sweetie (most of the time).  In the morning you wake up before Daddy goes to work, just so you can say bye to him and give him a hug.  You like helping him pick out his clothes for the day and getting his shoes out of the closet.  After he leaves, you crawl in bed with me and either go back to sleep or watch a show before brother wakes up.  On the days you don’t get to say bye to Daddy, you are sad about it all day.

You love playing with your brother, but you can kind of be a brat to him.  You tend to tease him a lot and take thing from him.  You also instigate a lot of fights and you like making him mad.  On the other hand, if he gets hurt, you are the first one to try and help and you worry about him.  You like helping him do things.

You love anything pink!  And Princesses!  And Ballerinas!  Even though you like to play in the dirt and fight with your brother, you are such a girly girl.

You say some of the funniest things with the funniest expressions.  It cracks me and Daddy up!

Getting you to eat your food is a struggle.  You hate trying new foods and really only like eating mac n cheese or grilled cheese sandwiches.  Even if we make you your favorite foods, there are just days you won’t eat.  Well, hopefully you get over that phase soon!

I love you more than rainbows and cotton candy!

 twins

A friend of mine  posted this and I thought it was rather appropriate:

Here is the poem from the book Let Me Hold You Longer by Karen Kingsbury.

Long ago you came to me,
a miracle of firsts,
First smiles and teeth and baby steps,
a sunbeam on the burst.

But one day you will move away
and leave to me your past
And I will be left thinking of
a lifetime of your lasts…

The last time that I held a bottle
to your baby lips
The last time that I lifted you
and held you on my hip.

The last night when you woke up crying,
needing to be walked,
When last you crawled up with your blanket,
wanting to be rocked.

The last time when you ran to me,
still small enough to hold.
The last time that you said you’d marry
me when you grew old.

Precious, simple moments and
bright flashes from your past-
Would I have held on longer if
I’d known they were your last?

Our last adventure to the park,
your final midday nap,
The last time when you wore your favorite
faded baseball cap.

Your last few hours of kindergarten,
those last few days of first grade,
Your last at bat in Little League,
last colored picture made.

I never said good-bye to all
your yesterdays long passed.
So what about tomorrow-
will I recognize your lasts?

The last time that you catch a frog
in that old backyard pond.
The last time that you run barefoot
across our fresh-cut lawn.

Silly, scattered images
will represent your past.
I keep on taking pictures,
never quite sure of your lasts…

The last time that I comb your hair
or stop a pillow fight.
The last time that I pray with you
and tuck you in at night.

The last time when we cuddle
with a book, just me and you
The last time you jump in our bed
and sleep between us two.

The last piano lesson,
last vacation to the lake.
Your last few weeks of middle school,
last soccer goal you make.

I look ahead and dream of days
that haven’t come to pass.
But as I do, I sometimes miss
today’s sweet, precious lasts…

The last time that I help you with
a math or spelling test.
The last time when I shout that yes,
your room is still a mess.

The last time that you need me for
a ride from here to there.
The last time that you spend the night
with your old tattered bear.

My life keeps moving faster,
stealing precious days that pass,
I want to hold on longer-
want to recognize your lasts…

The last time that you need my help
with details of a dance.
The last time that you ask me for
advice about romance.

The last time that you talk to me
about your hopes and dreams.
The last time that you wear a jersey
for your high school team.

I’ve watched you grow and barely noticed
seasons as they pass.
If I could freeze the hands of time,
I’d hold on to your lasts.

For come some bright fall morning,
you’ll be going far away.
College life will beckon
in a brilliant sort of way.

One last hug, one last good-bye,
one quick and hurried kiss.
One last time to understand
just how much you’ll be missed.

I’ll watch you leave and think how fast
our time together passed.
Let me hold on longer, God,
to every precious last.

 

On the Homefront

Wednesday, July 18th, 2012

So, it has been a little over 5 years since we moved into our house.  When we first bought it, all the rooms were hideous colors and the kitchen was in desperate need of a make over.  Well, we took care of the color issue for the most part.  We still need to paint the office, but since that will be Jack’s room in a few years, he can pick the color when he moves in.  The kitchen is still God awful, but that’s just not in the budget right now.  One of the biggest projects I wanted to tackle when we moved in was the front and back yards.  In the front yard we basically have a shit load of jasmine bushes and some ugly bushes.  Part of the year we have some lilies that bloom.  I hate lilies!  Well, the other day we were out trimming the ugliest of the ugly bushes.  It is the one that happens to be totally blocking the kids window and is taller than our house.  Anyways, rather than trimming, I said what the hell and just started cutting it down.  I guess that was the jumping off point.  We have finally fixed our sprinklers so hopefully our lawn will come back nice and pretty.  We will most likely have to throw some seed out there too since our lawns have never actually looked good.  The next step will be to take out the dreaded jasmine bushes.  Don’t ask me why we decided to do this in the middle of summer when it is God awful hot, but hey, at least it’s getting done!!  I think one of the hardest parts is that we only have so much room in our yard waste cans and we don’t really have a way to haul a big load down to the dump so we are just doing a little at a time.  Now we just need to decide what do do with all the empty space we will have.  It is already nicely edged with some pretty bricks.

For the back yard, this will be an even bigger project!!!  In the fall when it starts to cool down, we are going to tear down the “sunroom”  This is a “room” that the previous owners built by using two carport frames, some tarps, some plywood, and some lattice.  Oh, and to keep it from leaking where it is butted up against the house, they used pool noodles.  I shit you not.  They actually used pool noodles!!!  Up until now it has been fine for storage, but it is starting to leak and it has always looked like we were living Arkansas with a guy and a banjo.  Soooo, come this fall, it is coming down!!!  In its place I will be building 4 raised garden beds.  I’m really excited about teaching the kids all about where our food comes from and maybe it will encourage them to actually eat something if they grew it.

The backyard is also home to a dead lawn that Lunchbox uses as his shitter.  Well, we are thinking of just tilling it all under and putting down some fresh sod.  when we moved in the lawn was sort of green, but it was mostly weeds that got mowed down every so often.  I’m hoping we can get the dog to take his business elsewhere, but that may be hard.  To finish it off back there, I was thinking of doing a playhouse for the kids for Christmas.  Shhhhh, don’t tell Pat!!!!

 

Potty Time

Saturday, December 3rd, 2011

This is a little overdue, but Shae and I realized we never wrote up a post about our adventures in potty training. My take on the experience is probably much different from Shae’s, but I’m writing this post so you’ll just have to make do with my version.

About a month before their third birthday, we made a quick trip up to Disneyland with the kiddos. Since we didn’t want to deal with running to the bathroom the whole time we were there “we” (aka Shae) decided that we’d start the potty training the day after we got back. For about a week before the trip, we kept telling the kids that after we went to see Mickey we weren’t going to have diapers anymore. I’m pretty sure all they heard was “Mickey blah blah Mickey”, but they were warned.

Anyway, the day after our trip to visit Mickey the potty training started. I have to admit that I wasn’t overly optimistic. I didn’t think the kids were quite ready (they weren’t giving us any indication when they had to go), and I wasn’t sure about the method we were using (no pull-ups, basically the kids running around naked/in underwear all day). However, Shae had decided the kids were going to house broken by their third birthday, so I voiced my concerns but then got on board.

The first couple of days were pretty rough, especially on Shae. The kids were not comfortable using their potties, and would hold it until they were in pain. Even the offer of marshmallows wasn’t enough to entice them to go. We basically spent the weekend with both kids sitting on their potties in the living room crying while Shae and I begged them to JUST GO ALREADY!!! It got to the point where they would hold it until nap or bed time so they could go in their diapers. Eventually they started to figure it out, and by Sunday night they were already figuring out ways to get as many marshmallows (or “maws”) out of us as possible.

Well, after two days of the fun I decided that I’d had enough and ran away. I gave everyone hugs and kisses, told Shae I expected both kids potty trained by the time I got home, and hopped on a plane to DC. Shae will tell you that there was a lot of work, but I’m pretty sure that the kids woke up Monday morning pretty much potty trained. When I got home, both kids were using their potties and earning their “maws”: 2 for pee pee, 4 for poo poo (and believe me, they told us exactly how many they expected). They were still wearing diapers for their naps and at night, but other than that they were doing pretty good. We had to cut back their marshmallow rewards (to 1 and 2) because they were going through our supply too fast. About three or four days later, I had to go out of town again and when I got home the kids were using the real toilet. Again, I’m sure Shae would say she had something to do with that but I’m pretty sure the kids just figured it out on their own.

I can’t tell you how nice it was to go to Costco and not have to buy diapers. I really had no choice but to buy more beer to fill up the extra space in the cart. The kids are both doing great, and outside of the occasional nighttime accident after one of them drinks too much juice with dinner there have been almost no problems. The biggest issue we have is that now nap and bedtime have become times for the “Potty Game” where the kids take turns getting out of bed and using the bathroom. It’s extremely annoying, but a small price to pay for no longer having to buy diapers.

Update time

Friday, September 16th, 2011

Yikes!  It’s been awhile.  Soooo, our little (mis)adventure continues as the kiddos keep growing.  It’s hard to believe they will be 3 next month!!!  Seriously, where does the time go?

Let’s see, since our Death Valley trip we have done a lot… sort of.  Our latest trip was our yearly trip to Sedona to spend a long weekend at Grandma Jane’s time share.  As usual, we had a great time!  The kiddos went on their first jeep tour and seemed to have a pretty good time.  They weren’t too sure about it at first, but I think they warmed up to it.  The adults thought is was an awesome ride!  We have done a jeep tour before, but we had other people in the jeep with us.  This time it was nice because it was only us and we were able to stop when we saw interesting stuff or ask the driver a ton of questions.  Other than the jeep ride, we pretty much just spent a lot of time at the pool with the kids and Pat and I were able to sneak out a couple times and go on a “date.”

The kids also had their first long train ride recently.  I took them up to my parents house to go pick blackberries.  Since my car was having issues, I figured why not take the train?  It was actually pretty fun for the first 4 or 5 hours.  We colored a lot and watched movies and played with moon dough and took a lot of trips down to the cafe.  The last couple hours are another story.  There were no naps and it was getting to be bedtime so they started getting a little cranky.  A few timeouts later and we made it to SLO!  The kids had a great time picking blackberries and helping grandma in the kitchen making her famous apple cake.  To get back to San Diego, we hitched a ride with my parents so my mom could spend her birthday with us.  Well, that tured into a major misadventure.  Ella, Grandma, Grandpa, and myself all came down with a horrible stomach flu.  It was probably the worst flu I have ever had.  Poor Pat!  He was stuck taking care of all of us sickies and keeping Jack entertained.  He gets the husband/father of the year award for that.

The kids keep getting bigger and bigger and now we are doing the whole potty training thing.  I will do a whole post on that in a few day.

Everything else is going well too.  I have a bunch of photo shoots coming up and my Etsy shop is doing really well right now.  Pat is on travel a lot more than we would both like, but it is what it is.

Coming up we have the kids birthday and another train ride in store.  Hopefully I can keep them entertained for longer this time.